#i promise that i'll do better on my formatting next time

[naurnaville]

...He liked to think aloud in my presence. His remarks could hardly be said to be made to me—many of them would have been as appropriately addressed to his bedstead—but none the less, having formed the habit, it had become in some way helpful that I should register and interject. If I irritated him by a certain methodical slowness in my mentality, that irritation served only to make his own flame-like intuitions and impressions flash up the more vividly and swiftly. Such was my humble role in our alliance.

While reading through CREE, I found how funny it was to me how modest Watson places himself as, which I think can lead to borderline undermining himself through describing his acts of service as simply "humble". Though he's certainly honest about his efforts when mentioning how he isn't at the same intellectual speed as Holmes, I feel as if he's overlooking just how important his supposed "humble abilities" are. I mean, the fact that the whole paragraph is basically about how he's able to reliably provide a shining light to Holmes' mental abilities and thought process is kind of ironic to how modest he wants to place himself as, including how he compares his usual presence while Holmes is thinking to no different than "his bedstead". Though the latter point being more about Holmes' usual thinking process, I believe that he overlooks just how strong and reliable of a companion he is by focusing on what he's supposedly not as well equipped on, but even Holmes himself has commented on how undermining Watson is to himself as a whole more than once:

...I would take this opportunity to remark that if I burden myself with a companion in my various little inquiries it is not done out of sentiment or caprice, but it is that Watson has some remarkable characteristics of his own to which in his modesty he has given small attention amid his exaggerated estimates of my own performances. A confederate who foresees your conclusions and course of action is always dangerous, but one to whom each development comes as a perpetual surprise, and to whom the future is always a closed book, is indeed an ideal helpmate.

Here, in BLAN, Holmes notes on how Watson does, in fact, consistently put down his own reliable abilities to strengthen Holmes', and even goes to say how ideal of a companion he is because of his "weaknesses". This also extends to:

...And here it is that I miss my Watson. By cunning questions and ejaculations of wonder he could elevate my simple art, which is but systematized common sense, into a prodigy.

Not only is Holmes literally overlooking his own abilities here, but he is, at the same time, trying to uplift Watson's abilities and how notable his presence is, which seems to be nearly the exact opposite as how Watson sees himself as. He really is more than just a "humble whetstone" to Holmes, and it's ironic and a little discouraging how this essentially continues throughout the canon, with some exceptions. Even with these cases both in the press, they still can't come to the same conclusion between each other, that they are being too modest about themselves to the other. The mutual "humble and simple service" is really interesting to see throughout the canon, if not all of it, but just a bit disappointing.

[sulfurousdreamscapes]

How I Hacked My Short Story Brain into Developing a Novel

I promised I'd make this post, so here it is, but with a proper title and everything so that it'll be more generally helpful to other writers.

Regulars of this blog have probably noticed that I've struggled a lot with long-form fiction over the years, despite having churned out a library's worth of short fiction.

This time though, things are coming together, and it's because I've got a technique down that plays to my strengths as a short story writer.

Step 1: Outline and Draft Something

After writing and abandoning several outlines for my WIP Last Night, New Body, I finally set one in stone and wrote a draft for it this January.

The rough, first, skeleton draft was 30,000 words long - far from ideal, but better than nothing. It was tough, but I got it done in two months.

Step 2: Read Through and Take Notes

Next, I read through the draft and took notes on how I thought the novel could be improved. This included notes on plot, characters, and setting. The notes were all taken in a spread sheet in the following format:

Page Number -> Note Title -> Description -> Category

The 'Note Title' could be something witty or referential, but it has to be short, like the name of an achievement in a video game. So for example, it could be:

23 -> Enemy at the Gates -> Why does Nadia shut the door when she sees that Rhea has come to visit? -> Character

I took these notes freely, writing down any point that I thought could be changed, expanded, removed, or otherwise mused.

Once I was done with these notes, the question arose: what the hell do I do with these notes?

Step 3: Treat the Notes As Writing Prompts

This step is in-progress at the moment, but I'm halfway through it already! The idea is to take each note and write 500 words for it.

This comes naturally to me because I've written hundreds upon hundreds of flash fiction pieces for my blog, each one targetted for 500 words. This means I'm now developing the novel 500 words at a time, based on the notes I took while reading through the skeleton draft.

The process has been beautifully productive so far, and I've come up with so much detail, so many new scenes, and better developed characters. My next draft will be assuredly be much longer than the 30k words I got down before.

So how long will this take? That depends on how many notes you take. I initially took 72 notes, but I've found that as the story develops and changes, I've had to "delete" many notes because they became redundant or irrelevant. I say delete in quotes because I've actually moved them to a 'recycle bin' sheet of sorts, so that I can retrieve them later if I deem them important after all.

Next Steps? Outline and Draft the Thing

I'm generating a lot of meat for the skeleton draft, and I'm dying to put that meat on the bones. To do that, I plan on first constructing a very detailed outline, including as much detail from the expanded notes (the 500-word pieces) as possible.

This done, I'll write the 'flesh draft' while referencing both this outline and the skeleton draft. As excited as I am for this, I do anticipate this process to be difficult, so I might find a way to divide it into small, short story sized chunks as well.

Then come the edits and everything else. We'll cross those bridges when we get there.

[iridescentxstars]

｡˚ ꕥ 𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐬𝐜𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐱𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐬' 𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐤𝐭𝐨𝐛𝐞𝐫 '𝟐𝟒

Kinky season is coming and I thought I'd get a head start. From today until the end of September, I'll be taking kinktober requests while also working on some other fics that I hope to have done and ready soon (yes, the wolf fic is at the top of the list) This event is split into two different types: typical NSFW and dark, spooky NSFW because as someone kept making a point of, it's kinkTOBER and lines up with spooky season and I should have fun with that.

Idols allowed: Jongin, Bangchan, Minho, San, Seonghwa, Juyeon, Sangyeon and Irene

RULES:

Must have all qualifying factors to the prompt otherwise it will be deleted.

Drabbles made that are on the darker side will be tagged and properly trigger warned. Do not read them if you are uncomfortable. Every post will state everything used.

Always take care of yourself and be aware of what you read. This is all for fun and is not designed to upset anyone. Nothing written is believed to be how someone may behave and is all fictional.

Try to be original and fun. If a kink/prompt has been picked too many times, I will not do it

If you don't like a particular prompt/kink, feel free to ignore it, do not send snarky remarks to belittle what someone may enjoy

Some will very clearly work well together, some will not, while I do like a challenge, please be mindful about how it would work as I only have around 500 words to make it make sense

Please do not make the prompt too restrictive. These are meant to be drabbles and there needs to be creative freedom

Format: Must contain the following: Idol, AU, trope/dialogue/prompt, kink

You can have a trope OR a dialogue OR a prompt OR all of it. Mix and match. Requests that spark inspiration might get a longer piece written. You can choose up to 3 kinks but only 1-2 AU, tropes and prompts/dialogue to keep it easy!

All these prompts have been either thought about or found on other accounts because sometimes it's hard to remember or think about different ideas. The darker/spooky choices are coloured red to separate them from the safer choices.

Note: They can be interchangeable in the right circumstances. Mafia can be considered dark or maybe having a werewolf boyfriend is softer than we think.

AU: (some found here)

Roommates!AU

Mafia!AU

Werewolf!AU

Vampire!AU

College!AU

Angel!AU

Demon!AU

Hunter!AU

Co-Workers!AU

Friends With Benefits!AU

Superhero/Villain!AU

Yandere!AU

Monster!AU (specify what kind)

Killer!AU

Circus!AU

Stalker!AU

Mythology!AU (specify what kind/who)

Hybrid!AU

CEO!AU

Alien!AU

You Choose (will allow 3 max of this)

Tropes: (found here)

Enemies to lovers

Fake Dating/Marriage

Only one bed

Love potion

Kissing as a distraction

Jealousy

Blind Date

Taking care of them

Forbidden Love

Confessions

You Choose (will allow 3 max of this)

Dialogue/Prompt: (some found here)

“Don’t act innocent when we both know where your mouth was two minutes ago.”

“I could make you feel better.”

“My tongue still remembers the way you taste.”

“Come on, you have to work for it.”

“We won’t be missed for a couple hours, we should take advantage of that.”

“Hmm, is that a threat or a promise?”

“Let’s commit some sins.”

“Jealousy is not a word I’m familiar with.

“This is your work place, leave the boyfriend at home next time.”

“This seems like such a bad decision, but I just can’t help it.”

"You'll scream? Oh, baby, I really hope you do~."

You've been hearing noises for a while now, shuffling under your bed in the wee hours of the night. Most people would be scared to check whether it's their cat or not but you? You decide to lure the monster out by having a little fun.

There are no such things as monsters in your closet, that's what's always been told to you but how do they explain the eyes that watch you as you touch yourself? Or why you can't seem to stop doing it?

Everyone has a pet, a cute kitty cat or a puppy dog but you? Well, you have something that can't be found in a pet store... or... on this earth, actually.

A new haunted house has opened up and everyone is dying to go! You are scared, you won't deny that but what do you find scarier? The house and all its horror or the fact that being chased turns you on?

They told you that they would kill for you but you didn't think that they were serious... or did you?

You always joked with your extremely hot best friend that you would flirt and fuck your kidnapper because you read a lot of dark romance. So, they decided to make that dream a reality. Oh no, whatever will you do to gain your freedom?

Two words: Masked Men

You go to a party with your friends on Halloween and spot a handsome guy, walking around, shirtless, covered in fake blood with a mask on. Little did you know that it isn't quite a costume...

The dare was to enter the creepy, abandoned, possibly haunted asylum... not make out in it.

You Choose (will allow 3 max of this)

Kinks:

Oral

Toys

Knotting

Primal Play/Predator/Prey

Bondage

Praise/Worship

Degradation

Orgasm Control/Edging

Roleplay

Breeding/Creampie

Knife play

Blood play

Fear play

Dom/Sub

Impact Play

Overstimulation

Public

Dacryphilia

Free use (established/consensual)

Breath Play/Choking

Somnophilia

Owner/Pet

Voyeurism/Exbitionism

Photo/Video

Sensory Deprivation

Size Difference

Age Gap

You Choose (will allow 3 max of this)

I won't be putting the pressure on myself to do one a day as I do also work and everything else BUT I will try to do them every few days so there is no limit on what can be sent in as I'll go through and post like 1-5 at a time when I'm online and writing!

[venturelovebot]

Fluffcember Day Fourteen: Winter Soup

A/N: Prompt list is by @fluff-cember! Written in headcanon format. Comments and reblogs are deeply appreciated but not necessary! Also, how are we already two weeks through December?!

Warnings: None! Pure fluff!

(Divider by @bernardsbendystraws who requested the tag!)

🎄 You add in the flour to your roux and stir until it thickens.

🕊️ Already, the smell of savory food fills the house with a warm and inviting scent.

🪽 Sloan was still on their way home, having travelled across the world once again for over a month.

⛄️ You missed them dearly– and, by all means, they missed you dearly, too.

❄️ So, what better gift to greet them with than some freshly made soup?

☕️ Especially because it's been getting colder out.

🍪 You toss in the spices and stir it into your mixture.

🎁 Next, the broth goes in.

💫 The base for your soup is more than ready.

🔔 You're only distracted by your now ringing phone, startling you out of your thoughts.

🎄 "You scared me." You sigh, placing the phone between your cheek and shoulder.

🕊️ "Sorry! I just wanted you to know I'll be a little bit late." They sound disappointed. "Not by much! I promise! The monorail is just delayed is all."

🪽 "That's alright, really!" You assure them. "Dinner will be ready by the time you're back."

⛄️ "Oooh! What're you making?" They perk up instantly at the promise of food.

❄️ "It's a surprise!" You tell them with a smile.

☕️ "Gah–! I can't wait!" They sound so excited, it's truly adorable.

🍪 You hear the overhead announcement for the train on their end.

🎁 "Oh–! I'll be right there! I promi–" They accidentally hang up in their fanatic state, and you can't help but laugh.

💫 Your attention turns back to the soup.

🔔 "Right, where was I?" You look at all the ingredients laid up on the kitchen countertop.

🎄 "Right! Pasta." You remember.

🕊️ The tortellini goes into the broth and you mix it a few times to incorporate them.

🪽 "Mushrooms."

⛄️ Stir, stir, stir.

❄️ "Parmesan."

☕️ You grate fresh Parmesan cheese above the soup pot and watch as it all melts into the mouthwatering concoction.

🍪 Finally, you add in some salt and pepper for extra flavor.

🎁 You keep the heat on low so it stays warm until your beloved gets home.

💫 Now, all you had to do was wait.

🔔 For how long, though?

🎄 At least the soup was done. Did you have any other plans that needed to be addressed?

🕊️ You cleaned the house up a little bit earlier.

🪽 You had an afternoon nap on the couch snuggled under a blanket.

⛄️ You even caught up on your favorite show, and the next episode isn't out until next week.

❄️ Hm. You aren't aware of how much time actually passes just wondering about what you could do to pass the time.

☕️ Your eyes glance around the room.

🍪 Suddenly– the door opens.

🎁 "Oh, thank God. You saved me from having nothing to do." You practically run to greet Sloan as they walk through the door.

💫 They laugh.

🔔 "Can't have you relaxing just yet!" They throw their arms around you and place a kiss to your lips.

🎄 They kick the door shut behind them. As soon as you pull away, they lock the door and pull off their boots, leaving them on the linoleum by the front entrance.

🕊️ "Oh! I smell something good!" They grin.

🪽 "It's still warm, I'll get you some." You walk off to the kitchen.

⛄️ You grab matching bowls from the cupboard and fill them up with your cooking.

❄️ They can hardly wait to try it– as soon as it hits the table top they're practically slurping it down as if they were starving.

☕️ "Didn't know they deprived you of food during field work." You playfully remark, slowly spooning mushrooms and tortellini into your mouth.

🍪 "You have no idea! I haven't eaten in weeks!" They joke between mouthfuls of food.

🎁 "Go get some more, then. Can't have my baby losing weight!" You pinch their stomach lightly, and they giggle as a result.

💫 The two of you continue your meals in comfortable silence.

🔔 Although, by the time they're done, there's nothing left.

🎄 They drained the pot of every last drop.

🕊️ "Full?" You poke their tummy again.

🪽 "Ugh–" They lean back in the dining room chair. "Yes!"

⛄️ You ruffle their espresso colored curls atop their adorable head.

❄️ "Go lay down on the couch, I'll clean up and then we can cuddle." You tell them.

☕️ They happily oblige.

🍪 And, true to your word, you're quick to do the dishes and join them in the living room for some evening snuggles.

🎁 Only to find them already asleep, happily snoring away.

💫 You carefully place the blanket over their body and let them snooze.

🔔 After all, they deserve it for being so cute.

[sourbinnie]

☆ diamond eyes.mp3 ☆

♡ genre ¿? ♡ -> heavy angst ¡! ♡ pair ¿? ♡ -> chan x gn!reader ♡ plot ¿? ♡ -> time will see you realign but for now, he had to deal with the pain of your loss. ♡ warnings ¿? ♡ -> implied character death ; grieving ; cause of death isn't mentioned but i think you can imagine (s*icide)

a/n: new format with the saddest song i could've picked up and a really tragic imagine, i'm sorry if this is too triggering. if it's too bad, i'll delete it!

to the edge.

waves kept crashing on me in the middle of this lonely beach in my mind. places i traveled to, to forget about the reality i lived in. the one where you weren't next to me and i had to live with the weight in my heart. the one where you had to go and leave me all alone because you thought that was a better solution. the one where we had fought, we had made up and i thought we were good but it all had to end too soon when it didn't even start.

i gave you 6 whole years. i gave you 6 years of me, of my life, of my soul and i have to live with the fact that you're not here anymore? wake up and feel numb? dread and sorrow surrounded me. it felt like i was floating for a moment as i tried to get up from our bed. it was always going to be ours, it wasn't just mine and i didn't know why i was making such a fuss over a bed and it's owners. 

this is how i spent most of my days now. trying to survive and not being able to handle the truth at all. i stayed in our shared apartment, i couldn't find my way back to the dorms. i knew the boys were worrying but i didn't know why, they knew i could handle myself.

or maybe i couldn't at all.

what mocked me the most since you've left, was the ring. the one i bought with changbin & jisung one day when we were out. they helped me pick it and see what would fit perfectly in your finger. the one that held the promise ring when you decided to leave me. that would've been occupied with this perfect ring that i bought for you but life had other plans and it eliminated everything that we had planned out for the future. a future that didn't hold any hope, just more suffering and illness to haunt me. 

i could not do it without you before, what makes them think that taking you away from me is the solution?

it was not easy to wake up, it was not easy to live through the day and then go to sleep at night. having those dreams with you where i hold you and i don't let go because if i do i have to wake up and you're not there beside me anymore. how many times did i have to go through the same routine? how much more work could i drown myself into till it's enough? till the pain is gone and it's all enough. all i wanted was to be enough for you and you didn't want that.

you wanted me to be myself, well here i am and you're not. here i am as i visit you every day, as i bring flowers and place them where you lay to rest forever in peace. here i am as i cry my eyes out and scream till my voice is gone and i have to leave again to die more and more every day. i just wanted to reunite with you one last time to see you, to hold you, to tell you what you deserve to hear and that's more than i love you.

you shined brighter than any star.

now as i look into the sky, hoping you're there, watching over me, i can't help but think.

how beautiful you were the last time i saw you and how sad your expression was. how cruel life is that it took you away from where you belonged and that was here with me. how egotistical and pathetic i was when we fought, how everything was always about me and how you always put me first even though you were the one that mattered. you were the one bringing a change to the world, with that smile of yours and that loving heart. i could never compare to you, yet here i still was and you weren't, you weren't here anymore.

"i love you channie." resonated in my mind, as i tried to not lose my breath again. how many more times did i have to go through a day where you weren't here? how much could i handle without you? why do i have to handle things without you? why didn't i ran out of tears already? why is feeling numb better than being sad?

so many fucking questions and not one goddamn answer, because you weren't fucking here.

you didn't take me with you, didn't think about how i would feel without you and now you're gone. how much longer do i have to do this? how much grief is there in me? do i have to do this? i don't.

but i want to for you. i want to because you would've wanted me to, i want to because you're my light, my world, my star and you deserve it. you've been nothing but good to me these past 6 years and the unconditional love you gave me, deserves to live on. i would do it for you, for my family, for the boys, for everyone. even if it meant i have to fake a smile every single day as a i relive that haunting phone call, i will do it.

i think i am never gonna recover, never gonna be able to walk into a hospital again and never gonna be able to look at the stars and not think of you. i think you took everything from me when you decided to leave. 

i think i died with you.

i think i’m always gonna live in the shadow of your death and i’m not gonna be able to get up one day and decide to fall in love again. love was gone, there wasn’t any left to give or take, you took it all from me.

you took my heart, my soul and all of my strength.

i don’t think it’s fair how i get to stay and you don’t, i don’t think i’m doing a good job of carrying on when i don’t get to see you anymore. 

oh how i wish we could’ve had that proposal, that wedding, that eternal love. now i had to reminisce about memories i never lived and pray that this pain wouldn’t be eternal.

but i knew that as soon as i got to be with you again, i would be grateful.

[shesthespinstersimmer]

Catching up was a bit daunting, but that was compounded by the fact that, for some reason (probably because I haven't restarted in weeks), my laptop was running like molasses on pet rock in slow motion and I didn't want to restart it because I would lose my /chrono place ("Next" opens a new tab every time, so I didn't want to do that). So I aimed to just power through, but right after I reached your posts from mid-June, the tab crashed! So I took that opportunity shut it down and reboot. Definitely a faster experience afterwards. And even though I scrolled /chrono for ages to get back to where I was, it just stopped loading after a couple new posts! (YaY Tumblr! 😑) So I switched to using the Next links and just powered through until I was completely caught up. BUT IT WAS SO WORTH IT!

There were a lot of things that made me laugh and awww and smile and want to give you a high five over, but I'll just list a few.

Loved Shalom's growth, physical and emotional.

Loved the sibling dynamics.

Loved Judge B's continued openness and willingness to really change her life to find balance with Coop.

'Soul to Table"

Vanessa and Harper: from slight rebound, to maybe something, to better off friends, to intentional life long friends and cheerleaders.

Glynis and Neeto.

The parents handling their child/ren's maturation.

"We got boundaries, cuz"

Loved the couples/parents who had long loving histories, but also loved the parents/couples who've had a rough go or needed a second chance with the same person or another. Really loved the Chen's backstory.

Sabrina & Coop's post-nuptial interview format!

The wealth of variety of event styles showcased during the Wedding Season arc.

Sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo many of the editing choices!

Sometimes when I take a break from things, I never pick them back up again because just the thought of catching up is overwhelming, but I knew that when I returned to simblr that wanted to catch up with my shows and I knew that because of your posting frequency, yours was going to be the biggest undertaking, but I truly enjoy your narrative style and the range of topics and situations you cover in your stories, so I figured, come hell or high water, I was going to do it. And I'm so glad I did! Thanx for continuing to share your creativity and cultural insight with us!

YOU ARE THE 🐐!!!

I am beyond amazed – know that I’m fully aware how much of an undertaking that was! And thank you so very much from the bottom of my heart for doing it 😭😭😭

It’s just my little story; the one that keeps me sane, the one that gives me routine; something to promise myself that I’m gonna do every single day so that even the small days/the bad days have something good in them. 

Transparency: I’ve always felt guilty posting so much, but on the other hand, better here than filling up my brain day and day out. It’s been so helpful to have somewhere to put it.

My circle is small, and that’s how I like it; too much would be overwhelming. But knowing that people read and enjoy what I’m doing is astounding and incredible. Tumblr has kept me accountable when it comes to my writing, but watching you the last few days catching up post after post (and yes, I realize that it was an obscene amount ) is it feeling? I can’t even find the words for.

I’ll just stay with THANK YOU 🖤🤘🏾✨ so very much.

*I’m gonna run off and cry now *

[chevvy-yates]

WIP WEDNESDAY

got tagged by @aggravateddurian ! <3

again only writing:

Cyberpunk 2078 — Pandemonium:

Technically I can already start layouting the 2nd chapter as the written part is 100% done, but I am still missing some VP where I have to place Hizumi, Vijay and Ryder in the Afterlife and, ofc I am either too lazy to do that or I just forget about it bc I distract myself with other stuff (that also wants to be done). But as soon as I get to it you can expect the 2nd chapter! At least for those who are interested in it.

New pinned post coming soon:

I am about to make a new pinned post, yes it will be a brand new post but contain more or less the same my current one has. I just wanted to refresh my boys profiles, tweak the formatting a little and make them a bit better readable but they won't differ much from the current ones. I'll exchange the profile pics with given time tho as I'm not satisfied with most pics but have no time to throw each after another into the game just to get the perfect pic for it.

About Blorbos:

I am trying to sort out/clean up my boys' wardrobes. E.g. I noticed Thyjs has too much stuff and from every piece like up to 3 versions. I force myself to get it down to one piece, which doesn't work all the time, but I slowly get there. When he's done I'll have to do the same with the other boys thow Ryder is the most unproblematic of all as there's only one iteam in black for him in the first place of most mods.

I don't want them to wear all the same clothes unless it's basic stuff or shoes. I also try to get rid of most replacers unless it's stuff that hasn't been made as xl yet or need to be kept for color reasons and what not. It takes me so long because I also clean up my folders where I storage their original files as well sorting out those I have taken out. You know each of my boys has their own save file. I am also renaming some files to have a better overview as bru I tell you thjys is close to 300 mod files.

Chrome Chamber Rave concept:

Prepared some posts already but I am hesitating to push the post button bc my brain is stupid telling me shit I shall not listen to.

that's all for now. I promise next wip post will contain some pics or sth cooler than just text! I don't like it either.

tagging:

@astarionhistears, @nervouswizardcycle, @gloryride, @elvenbeard, @heywoodvirgin, @rosapexa, @streetkid-named-desire, @therealnightcity, @wanderingaldecaldo, @koda-shoulda-woulda-but-didnt, @breezypunk, @ouroboros-hideout and anyone who wants to or has to show something. No Pressure and if tblr mentions don't work, I'm not even trying to edit it as I am tired of it not working properly.

[ourghoststories]

Carrier Chaos [Bucky Barnes x Reader]

I was losing my mind, I couldn't cope with the loud noises of the crew drill outside and around the ship going on.

I was on a carrier ship and it made me feel anxious, I thought I started hearing the voices of everyone in my past who had kept me control under HYDRA.

The avengers carrier was what I was on and it was in the ocean, I was with Bucky on the Ship and I needed to find him before I had a panic attack.

Sweat beaded my forehead as it intensified, he was on the same floor as me, I just had to make it down to his room.

Finally I made it down the ship to his room, but he hadn't answered, dang it, he would've been in the training room, working on his form for fighting, the drill was probably getting to him too.

I walked to the lift and took it up two floors, with the sirens still blaring so I felt woozy, I took a minute, before I got off the lift, but by that time it started to head up to the cafeteria.

Lucky it did because Bucky walked in and saw me "hey y/n what are you- oh shit doll you aren't doing too well and look like you're struggling with the drill" he said with a concerned tone.

"Hey, look at me, you're doing fine, you just need to look at me and breathe" he said softly, pulling me into a hug.

"I- i- Bucky, I'm having a panic attack" I breathed rapidly, feeling the panic take over.

I blanked out.

--

"It's gonna be okay, it usually happens to me but I've learnt to get used to it. I know what you're going through Doll, just trust me and try to breathe. In... And out... See like this" he explained, motioning to his chest when he was breathing.

I tried breathing in and out but the panic was still overtaking me, my eyes filled with tears and I hugged him but pulled back "I'm sorry Buck" I cried.

"Hey, calm down... I know it's hard but you can do this. If I can, you can. I promise. Cross my fingers and pinky swear" he smiled softly.

My breath hitched in my throat, the alarm subsided and I felt like I could calm down, it had me exhausted as I used up so much energy having the panic attack, Bucky knew how to help me.

"Let's go to your room, how are you feeling?" He ushered before taking me to my room.

"Don't worry, we'll be docking soon and we can get off for some quiet time, before they send us on our upcoming mission. I think you should take it easy for the next day, keep a low profile" he smiled, patting me on the back.

I planted a kiss on his cheek, he looked a bit shocked but overall grateful "thanks Bucky, I really appreciate your help. You know how hard it's been lately... I've been struggling to sleep, been hearing voices, having flashbacks. It's been awful. But you've been helping me through" I smiled.

"Hey it's gonna be okay, I'm going through the same stuff, I can barely get through a night without having a night terror, I wake up sweating and struggle. You've seen me up at ridiculous hours of the night, I can't stop shaking." He gulped, looking at the group and shaking his head solemnly.

"Hey Bucky, stop being so hard on yourself" I reassured, I cupped his chin with my hands, before slowly and deeply kissing him, trying to make him feel better like he made me feel.

"I didn't know that's what you were going to do, please do it again. I love the feeling of your lips on mine y/n" he smiled, I hadn't seen him smile like that before.

"Wow, I didn't actually think you liked me back like that" I said, unknowingly.

"You bet I do, I have for a while y/n, I just didn't expect you to feel the same about an old guy like me" he said in a more serious tone.

"Old guy, please Bucky- I like you for you" I quipped back.

He cocked his eyebrow up, as if to say he didn't believe me "do I have to prove it to you super soldier?" I laughed, reminiscing about old times.

"Hmm I'll get back to you on that one" he laughed, pulling me into another hug and returning a kiss on the cheek.

A/N----

sorry this is a repost, just fit the formatting better

[kadytimberfox]

Kady's Expanse (Re)Watch Blog

Episode 1.01 - "Dulcinea" (Pilot)

And here we go for my...fourth time I've watched this episode I think? It's a really wonderful pilot that does so much work with introducing you to the world, our cast of characters, and setting up the threads of the main plot and does it all perfectly in a very tight 45 minutes. It reminds me a lot of Deep Space Nine's pilot "The Emissary" which is similarly a masterclass in tight storytelling and how to properly kick off a new series.

And speaking of kicking off a new series, hey! I'm watching this show that I absolutely adore again and I'm going to take the time to spout my thoughts about it on the internet because that seems like a fun idea! I really enjoy thinking about media critically but I've never taken the time to write down my thoughts before. It's a style of writing I've always wanted to try so where better to do that than a Tumblr blog? I'll try to keep these Brief and Not Boring but no guarantees on either. Especially on this one. It's the pilot, after all.

I also want to keep this as light on spoilers as possible; again though, no guarantees. Also if you haven't seen this show yet just go fucking watch it it's so good.

Later in this post is a description of torture that happens in the episode. I marked it with a TW and formatted the text to make it distinct from the rest of the post.

With that out of the way, there's nothing left to do except pick apart this pilot!

---------------------------------------

Summary

We kick off with a bang (and then some more banging) as we see a young woman named "Julie" fight her way out of a locked compartment, explore the darkened hallways of her Completely Fucked Spaceship, and watch her friends get eaten alive by some evil blue space goop. Surely none of that will be important later.

Cut to the adventures of hard-boiled Belter detective Joe Miller and his new Earthling partner Dimitri Havelock. They're private cops for an Earth corporation who theoretically maintain order on Ceres Station in the Asteroid Belt, the biggest shithole this side of pretty much anywhere. They go to a murder scene and do basically nothing, antagonize and then arrest people minding their own business at a bar, and take a bribe to half-ass a health inspection. Y'know, classic cop stuff.

Back at the precinct, Miller gets an off-the-books job from his boss to find one Juliette Andromeda Mao, daughter of megacorp magnate Jules-Pierre Mao and coincidentally the spitting image of "Julie" from our opening scene. Apparently, her pro-Belter activism is starting to piss off dear old dad and they want her to come home before she embarrasses the family any further.

In the middle of his investigation, he finds out that those air filters he "inspected" earlier crapped out and poisoned some children. Instead of taking accountability for not doing his job, he decides to throw the sleazy air filter guy into an airlock and only lets him out after he promises not to fuck it up next time. And also to pay Miller double. I'll let it slide though because Sleazy Air Filter Guy is an asshole.

Back on Earth, United Nations Undersecretary Chrisjen Avasarala shows up for about five minutes in this episode. The only thing she does is torture a guy. End scene.

Meanwhile, the good ship Canterbury is on its way to Ceres with a big haul of space ice that the station needs to turn into water. Second Officer James Holden gets immediately promoted, much to his dismay, because his previous boss Mike Ehrmantraut went insane from being out in space too long.

Mystery strikes when the gang gets a weird distress signal from a ship called the Scopuli. Captain McDowell, probably having watched enough Star Trek episodes to know that this can't be anything good, decides to ignore it. Holden just can't stop himself from doing a good thing, though, and secretly reports the signal, officially making the Canterbury Legally Obligated™ to investigate.

He picks his away team (unknowingly also picking the people he's going to spend the rest of this show with) and takes a shuttle to investigate the drifting Scopuli, where they find everything shut down except for the beacon that brought them here. "Pirate bait", or so it seems.

Suddenly, McDowell advises the away team that a very scary ship has appeared out of nowhere and that they need to get the hell out of there. The gang gets back on the shuttle just in time for the mystery ship to fire not just regular torpedoes, but nuclear torpedoes at them. The torpedoes close to zero...and then continue streaking towards the Canterbury.

Holden tells McDowell to eject the space ice to form a protective barrier, but he refuses, apparently willing to die rather than lose his payday. The payday (and everything else aboard) is lost anyway, however, as the Canterbury erupts into the most beautiful supernova I've ever seen.

"She's gone. They nuked her. She's gone."

-----------------------------------

My thoughts

So this is where I actually have to do the analysis thing. Since the beginning of this show is split into three primary subplots that all deal with a different piece of the Julie puzzle (a narrative device that I fucking love, by the way), I'll divide things up by talking about each one individually because that just makes sense.

Before I do that though, I just want to briefly say that that opening scene with Julie on the Scopuli is just the perfect opening to this show. It immediately gives us a very brief glimpse inside the puzzle box that our main cast is going to spend all of this season (and most of this show) trying to open. It's quick, it's tense, it's completely terrifying, and it's unforgettable if you've seen it.

------------------------------------

Miller on Ceres:

And we follow up that perfect opening scene with a perfect choice for which of these three main threads to start with. The thing that's great about dividing up the characters like this is that each of them only has a piece of what's going on with Julie and the Scopuli, but no one has the full picture. Miller, though, gets the most information off the bat and is the only person in the main cast who's looking for Julie specifically, so it's only natural that we should start with him.

His story is also the inspiration for the title of this episode, "Dulcinea". For those of you who aren't big Don Quixote fans, it's a reference to Quixote's fantasy lover that he invents because he styles himself as a knight and, of course, every knight needs his damsel. He describes her in excruciating detail; she's royalty in a far-off land who is the epitome of feminine beauty, the ideal of Womanhood Incarnate--or his vision of it at least.

And the deeper Miller goes in his investigation, the more quixotic he gets with his idea of who Julie is. He's never met or spoken to Julie, but as he unravels her activities prior to departing on the Scopuli, he becomes increasingly obsessed with her, imagining what kind of a person she must be, picking apart every little detail and transposing it onto his vision of what her life must be like. I'm sure he would call it "being a good detective", but it's much more than that to him.

Throughout Miller's jaunt around town with Havelock, they banter back and forth, and through their conversations, we get a great sense of their personalities. Whereas Miller is the grizzled veteran who's had his morality thoroughly beaten out of him, Havelock is a by-the-book rookie cop who seems genuinely interested in learning about Belters, if only so that he can police them more effectively.

It's a very tried-and-true buddy cop pairing, but it works really well here. Havelock gets to be our audience surrogate for this story as we learn more about how Ceres and Belters operate.

This thread has the biggest worldbuilding burden out of the three and it pulls it off so well. We get so much about life in the Belt, the politics of the Solar System, the Outer Planets Alliance, or OPA (who will definitely be showing up later), and the logistics of maintaining a huge population of humans on a space station. And none of it feels clunky or awkward in the slightest. It's exactly the style of worldbuilding I loved in "The Emissary" from Deep Space Nine.

Ceres itself also has huge DS9 vibes, and not in a good way. The set design team did such a good job making this place look old, weathered, and completely falling apart. Except, of course, for the nice apartment buildings where the cops, off-worlders, and everyone else rich enough to ignore the seedy underbelly get to live.

There are a ton of fantastic, evocative lines in this arc, but I think my favorite is Miller's deadpan proclamation that "There are no laws on Ceres, just cops." A perfect summary of everything we see on screen about how power is wielded in this place.

-------------------------------------

Chrisjen on Earth:

This is the shortest thread where the least happens, but it will grow into one of my favorites. We don't get too much additional insight into what's going on, but we do get two important things: 1) Chrisjen Avasarala is a stone-cold bitch who thinks the OPA are terrorists, and 2) the OPA are apparently trying to get their hands on illegal stealth technology, which doesn't help with the whole "terrorism" thing.

This links up to both Miller's and Holden's subplots: we know about the OPA from Miller, and the ship that eventually blows up the Cant was using Martian stealth tech. Of course, since Holden and crew have no idea about the OPA, they immediately start thinking that Mars is out to get them, which will continue to play into the story going forward.

!-- TW: DESCRIPTION OF TORTURE --!

Also important to note is that Chrisjen is getting this information through the most brutal torture I've seen on TV in a long time: forcing a Belter whose body can't handle Earth's gravity to stand for hours on end by holding him up with hooks under his arms. After Chrisjen goes on and on about his "weak Belter lungs and brittle Belter bones", she coldly turns around and tells them to hold him up for another 10 hours. "If he survives, call me."

!-- TW ENDS --!

Fucking ghoulish, and definitely not a good look for Madam Undersecretary's first appearance. You're gonna have to trust me now when I say that she becomes one of my favorite characters in the main cast. This is about as bad as she gets, but she continues being manipulative and cold-blooded for most of this show. That's just who she is. To me, it's part of what makes this subplot of scheming at the UN so engaging.

We'll be seeing a lot more of Chrisjen going forward, and she'll get much better. At the very least, she will stop torturing this guy. But only because someone will tell her not to.

-----------------------------------

Holden on the Canterbury:

If Miller's story shows us life in the Belt and Chrisjen's shows us the politics of the Solar System, Holden's thread is all about life onboard a spaceship, which is important because we're going to be spending a lot of time on spaceships. This is also the part of the episode that has the most CG and honestly it holds up really really well. I know it's less than a decade old and they probably got a lot of money for the pilot but still! It looks great!

I'll drop a brief shoutout here as well for the ship designs in this show. They knocked it out of the goddamn park with the Cant's design: it's a big, boxy, dull gray, ugly thing that looks designed to haul ice and do literally nothing else. Everything is so practical and, above all else, plausible. They look like humans from the near future built them and that's the highest compliment I can give them.

There are shades of the first act of "Alien" here as we are essentially dropped into the Cant in the middle of its mission and get to see the camaraderie and hierarchy between all the members of the crew. We also get to know more about Holden, and immediately he begins showing us his defining character trait: he wields a lot of authority and respect, but he hates being in charge.

We see this in the very first scene onboard the Cant when one of the ice haulers, Paj, gets his arm severed while working outside the ship. He seems completely unfazed by this, though, since the company will send him a prosthetic and he's been working for them long enough to get a really good one.

Not only does this happen often enough that the company just buys prosthetics as a cost of doing business, there are literally tiers of coverage depending on years of service. What an optimistic future this is turning out to be.

Paj pleads with Holden to make sure the company doesn't send him a "used" arm (a frightening thought), to which Holden replies with something that he will continue to say, in so many words, over and over: "I'm just another clock-puncher like you." Holden knows he has authority on the Cant, but all he wants to be is a clock-puncher, which he makes very clear to pretty much everyone he talks to, including Captain McDowell when he essentially forces the XO job onto him.

Later on, we get our first glimpse at Holden's other primary personality trait, that being that he is The Main Character and therefore the most kind-hearted soul that can exist in this cold, selfish world. He logs the distress signal they received from the Scopuli, thereby ensuring that they'll have to divert from Ceres (and lose their on-time bonus) in order to investigate.

He shares this privately with Chief Engineer Naomi Nagata before the shuttle mission, to which her only reply is to tell him to keep that to himself. Fair play, considering she was just talking about how she wanted to strangle the little fucking do-gooder before she realized it was her new XO. Excuse me, Acting XO.

Before the shuttle launch, we're briefly introduced to the rest of the away team: the aforementioned Naomi; her mechanic Amos Burton, whose defining character trait is doing whatever Naomi tells him to do; ship's pilot Alex Kamal, who we previously saw being an annoying blabbermouth on the Cant; and Med-Tech Shed Garvey, who sewed up Paj's arm and wants everyone to know that he does not want to be here. Yes, his first name really is Shed.

Most of this part of the episode is setting up what'll happen next so we don't get a lot of time with any of these guys, but we'll have time for some great character work in the coming episodes.

----------------------------------

And that said, what a great setup for what comes next! Nearly all of the people we just got to know on the Cant are vaporized by a mysterious ship, there's a cloud of space debris hurtling toward Holden's little shuttle, and we have a hell of a puzzle box to dig into. Did Mars blow up the Cant? Did the OPA? Why would either of them want to? What does it all have to do with Julie and the Scopuli? And what the hell was that fucking space goo??

Despite covering so much ground in this pilot, The Expanse makes it very clear that we've barely scratched the surface. And even though I've already seen this whole show and know where it's going, it took everything I had to not hit the "next episode" button.

I will be doing that very soon though because I had a blast writing this up and I definitely want to keep doing it! Apologies that this one ran so long -- I assumed I was going to write a lot with this being the first episode and everything but I had so many thoughts that didn't make it into this post. I'm sure I'll be refining the format as we go along as well.

If you read all the way to here, I'm genuinely flattered and I hope you have a wonderful day.

~ Kady <3

[townofcadence]

Rules

I tried to bold the important bits for anyone who'd prefer to skim. I know there's a lot here, but it's mostly the basics and some explanations! Please don't let it intimidate you too much, I promise I'm just an anxious little creature who's likely eager to meet you! I just want to make sure you know what you might be getting into ^^

-I am tracking the tag townofcadence! My ooc tag is #tristan rambles

-This is an in-character rp and ask blog for my OCs, with a focus on Artair as my main! Please don't take my OCs designs or adopt them as a muse for yourself, unless you have my explicit permission (though a writing gift would be entirely fine!).

-Reblogging my art is totally fine! You'll probably make my day if you comment on it in the tags. If it's something I don't want reblogged, I'll turn off reblogs or tag it with #do not reblog . Otherwise, feel free to interact with it!

-With RPs, if it's something ongoing with another blog that isn't yours, please don't reblog it! It doesn't bother me, but most rpers can be upset by this, so as a respect to them, I would rather avoid the issue. You can reply to rps in the notes, or send me asks about them! But please do not reblog the rp post itself! If the post is open, however, then feel free to jump in as you want if you are an rper and have a muse!

-My social anxiety is really bad-- if I follow you, I definitely want to interact! But also, I really struggle to initiate conversation. If a person reaches out I'll happily interact with them though; I'm kind of a social-vampire, and feeling invited in helps a lot. On the other hand, once I'm spoken to, I talk a LOT, so I apologize in advance and hope it isn't too overwhelming. Feel free to tell me to tone it down!

-I don't feel comfortable writing with muses that are real people. Faceclaims are fine (not for me personally, but i don't mind rping with someone using them), but rping as the actor/actress or someone else from history themselves is uncomfortable for me because they were a real person. Similarly, I don't want to do rps that revolve around real world events, historical or current.

-I think communication is vital to a hobby like this. If you have a question or issue, please let me know! Also, If I do something insensitive or hurtful, please let me know and I'll try to do better next time.

-If you softblock or hardblock me, that's fine! I will not take offense. I may be a little sad if it happens out of nowhere and i thought we had a rapport, but I will respect the boundary. I will not reach out and I will not chase or confront you in any way. I will delete any of our drafts/asks I have and move on. Your dash is free to curate how you'd like. Please feel free to unfollow or block and make your space the best one for you, and if you're afraid of a reaction for doing so, this is my gentle reminder there won't be any.

-However, to me both soft or hardblocking actions say "I no longer wish to engage" just to varying degrees. So I will not chase you, i will not cross that boundary, and I will not refollow you if i was only softblocked, because I have been shown to be unwanted in your space. Especially if you did not communicate with me beforehand. If you wish to reconnect, you will have to reach out first, because until otherwise shown i will assume that's still what you want. So if you use this as a test of some sort, me not chasing doesn't mean I don't care. It is just me choosing to respect the implications of your decision.

-I am a person who deeply enjoys horror threads and dark themes, so please be aware there will be threads and art/writing containing that on this blog. It can involve things like blood, torture, injury, gore, kidnapping, mutilation or dying and lots in between, so please take care of yourself! I will tag things too!

-Related: this blog does not condone any bigotry, and I refuse to write anything depicting incest or pedophilia.

-Anything potentially triggering I will try to tag. The format for tagging will be ‘#cw *insert trigger here*’. Example being #cw injury. I will try to be consistent! Please feel free to ask me if I need to tag anything!

- I’ve been writing Artair for years, so Artair has a lot of background history that might get alluded to, but not actively explained. If you have questions, feel free to throw them my way and I’ll answer what I can! Additionally, I tend to keep my muse's backstory and abilities hidden, so they can be revealed naturally in threads. But if you want to know more, please hit me up and I can share whatever you'd like to know, or even the whole story! I'm happy to share and it's not a problem to ask, I just think it's fun to reveal things via narrative too.

-I am 25+, and may do mature threads, but sexual threads will not happen here. I'm fine with them, but not on this blog, I have other spaces. Here will get the fade to black treatment.

-I likely am going to be semi-selective in what I rp. I will answer asks and reply to things from anyone, so feel free to send in! But while I want to interact, I also only have so much energy. I have the right to refuse to answer RPs or starters or asks.

-I am also chronically ill in a few different ways, so sometimes I will disappear to recover or not have much energy. I have no problem waiting for replies to rp or messages, and I hope we can be patient with each other as needed to have a fun time. Take your time, and I'll get to you as soon as I'm able, too.

-A given, but No autohitting, godmodding, or metagaming unless discussed! If you want something to happen specifically, talk to me and we can work out why or how.

- I want you to play your muse as you intended, and I'll do the same! Please don't hold your muse back, I as the mun will not take it personally whatever yours may do, and I encourage you to let your muse act as they would in the situation without worry! Mun =/= muse, so I'd rather you play them as authentically as possible. Break up with my muse! Punch them! Flirt with them or follow them around! Be free! I won't hold mine back either; hopefully it'll make for some interesting interactions!

- I will always give at least a paragraphs or two in an rp response but even if you give me several pages, my reply may be more succinct. I'm trying to break the habit of backtracking dialogue in a thread, since it gets confusing really fast. I totally get wanting to respond to everything, but doing so to every talking point ends up with the muses having like six differing conversations at once. So I might skip things I want to respond to, to avoid that, and my replies may be smaller to keep the flow of interactions smoother. Hopefully I'll give my partner enough to work with. If not, let me know!

-Please understand that if you DO rp with me, I do not ship characters unless it develops naturally or it feels right. If something happens, it happens, but I won't pair anyone unless the muse legitimately develops feelings over their interactions. Those actions do not need to be written necessarily, and do not need to be on Tumblr, but they need to happen first. I feel it’s only safe to let people know, since some muns are looking to ship as their primary goal.

-All Icons I use I either have permission from the artist to use, or made myself! I will likely use icons sometimes as I begin to amass them, but I don't expect anyone to use them to write with me. I also don't format my posts except for fun on rare occasions where it feels fitting. I don't expect anyone to match my format, and I hope my simplicity won't be an issue for anyone!

If you read through this, then thank you very much! I hope to interact with you soon, and if not, then I hope your day is great and I appreciate you looking at my blog! If you want to break the ice, you can send me the password '*Gives the Trimst a scritch*'! It is not a requirement though!

[bringbackwendellvaughn]

If you were the director of the Raft and had the choice to pick out members for your own version of Thunderbolts, who would you pick?And why?

Any of my Marvel knowledge is about 12 years out of date now.

First, I'll acknowledge that the question posed is "who makes sense" as opposed to simply "who do I like", so I'll try and ignore my inane need to have Grizzly in every comic.

Songbird always screams as the obvious candidate to lead any team.

Team-wise, since my larder is Raft inmates I'll immediately remove the past members that were "heroes" the last time I really was invested in the universe (Atlas, Abe, Radioactive Man, Jolt) even though they pretty much all were made evil again in the comics. I'll also try and steer clear of too many repeated members - as much as Blizzard, Amazon or Boomerang have potential to be better... they didn't manage it the first time, so I'd be a wishful fool to make a team of people who showed some promise but then as much as gave up. With that said, I am keeping two from The Raft era because they plain work on this format of prison reform team and... well, we'll get to her.

I think Juggernaut always makes sense. Keeping him on the straight and narrow by way of Thunderbolts is only beneficial for everyone. As a member of the team, and previously the X-Men, it was shown quite clearly that offering him the chance to contribute and giving him clear focus effectively removes his inclination to waywardness. His temper and the ease to manipulate him need to be worked on or taken into account.

Next up, might as well keep it rolling with the X-Men's rejects so we have Mimic. Mimic is and has always been directionless but shows capacity to both recognise the right thing to do and even the desire to do so. Away from the X-Men and any feelings of inferiority or being a copy, he can find some inspiration from Songbird and his team-mates to be the hero he thought he could have been instead of hiding behind an attitude and apathy. Mimic's powers alone make him beyond useful in any situation, but they also present an opportunity to adapt and plan in advance. (I'm going with the Exiles set-up of him being a mutant allowed to copy 5 mutant powers at a time and they are only half as powerful as the original - because that made the most sense and didn't make him completely OP)

Ghost. Like Juggernaut, the team takes him out of the running to be a future potential enemy. He has a skillset and expertise that is valued and the team helps Ghost better himself allowing him to interact with others and come to develop human connections and feelings which he has otherwise denied himself. Manipulating Ghost or keeping stuff hidden from him will only make him a nuisance or a threat - instead allow him a mixture of respect (for his abilities and intelligence) and don't give him any reason to feel misled or paranoid.

Sylvie Lushton, the Enchantress from the Young Masters, is still young and could be set on the right path. She's not yet a broken toy, her moral compass is simply undeveloped with her attitude still being that of any spoilt high school girl - shallow, fickle and vapid. Her greatest asset is she already has some finesse with aspects of her magic (teleportation) and potential to tap into even greater spellcasting than she has so far displayed. Essential to accommodate her relationship with inmate Melter, no use in removing one of the few things that present possibility for her to feel or care for someone. (Melter isn't unsalvageable either but I think he would benefit from serving his time - for manslaughter, I think that was his only crime? Although come to think of it I'm not sure Sylvie even committed any crime?).

In what I already suspect is a bad decision, I think Tiger Shark too could be rounded into, at least, an agent. He has attempted to turn over a new leaf before and his erratic motivations and even physical appearance seem to be the result of an imbalance of oxygens similar to that which also affected Namor. With appropriate treatments, Tiger Shark may again be susceptible to the idea of reform. On the Thunderbolts, he offers two great advantages - a second tank to stand beside Juggernaut and then someone uniquely suited to any aquatic elements.

Continuing the trend of poor choices... let's finally get to the obvious - Moonstone is insubordinate, she can't be trusted and she is unlikely to really accept or even ideate the notion of personal redemption again. However, it is much easier to include her as a team-mate than ever have to count her as an enemy. Active involvement in the team mollifies and reduces her threat to others significantly - however, preparations and contingencies should be made for the possibility of flippant betrayal. Her manipulating any of the team to her own ends should also be anticipated, expected and combated as best as it can be.

Lastly, what the team is lacking is someone who doesn't rely on strength or big powers, so we round off the team with Crossfire. He is a highly trained combatant, an excellent marksman, a master of battle strategy and has intuitive technological proficiency. He has no interest in atonement or bettering himself, no desire to be a good person or wash the blood from his hands... but he is a professional. Simply allowing him the chance to use his abilities to work off his sentence or work towards gaining a clean slate for past crimes could provide incentive.

All I can say is, I hope Graviton doesn't murder them all.

[rosietrace]

Shard family thoughts; Victoria on Touma Kadokawa

Victoria's thoughts on Touma Kadokawa, the alluring two-faced resident of Terrovania

Ocs featured: Victoria Shard, Touma Kadokawa (@nem0-nee)

Mentioned: Zenith Devi, Sumeragi Yuuta, Claudia and Wendell Du Nord

Terrovania belongs to; @celiica/@terrovaniadorm

The following banner will be used for the next couple of OC/Shard family thoughts

Important note; I will likely be using this format of character interactions/thoughts from now on

♝•°•═════ஓ๑【 ♛ 】๑ஓ═════•°•♝

▹ 【 ♛ 】 Victoria Shard, the beautiful manipulator of Pomefiore; Thoughts on Touma Kadokawa

“Touma..... He's certainly of use to me. I allow him access to my funds and to spend them freely, so long as he continues to be of service to me.”

“Now, don't get the wrong idea, our beneficial relationship is nothing as you'd imagine. As long as he uses his influence to get what I want, I'll give more than the world can offer.”

▹ †𝆤࿙๋࿙࿚⊱【 ♛ 】⊰࿙࿚๋࿚𝆤†

╰──・⌕・- Additional thoughts(Non-dialogue)

→ Victoria…. Was once completely neutral about Touma

˚₊· ͟͟͞➳❥ At first, she didn't completely care much for the young man, almost completely neglecting his existence

˚₊· ͟͟͞➳❥ That was until Zen mentioned Touma in passing during one of their many conversations together

˚₊· ͟͟͞➳❥ Curious, Victoria began doing some peculiarly devoted levels of research on Touma in order to get a better understanding of what kind of character he is; To satisfy her curiosities, of course

˚₊· ͟͟͞➳❥ She didn't have a proper conversation with Touma until three weeks into her research on him; Which was going surprisingly smoothly, might I add. Her subordinates such as Claudia and Wendell are very thorough when it comes to research

˚₊· ͟͟͞➳❥ The conversation was brief at best, strained at worst; Touma was - in Victoria's eyes - annoyed that she was unaffected by his badmouthing of her

˚₊· ͟͟͞➳❥ Then again, he did and still does somewhat respect her for her bulletproof confidence

˚₊· ͟͟͞➳❥ A couple of days after that conversation was when Victoria was reminded of Touma's materialism after spending time with Yuuta; A man who is notorious for being a bit too materialistic for his own good

˚₊· ͟͟͞➳❥ For circumstances I cannot and likely will never elaborate on, Victoria sought out Touma

˚₊· ͟͟͞➳❥ She sought him out, and once he had his sights on her, she offered him something he couldn't possibly reject; The benefit of spending her funds as freely as possible

˚₊· ͟͟͞➳❥ Of course, her services to Touma didn't come without effort on his end; In exchange for the ability to spend on her wealth, Touma had to promise to assist her by…. Manipulating dealing with people she doesn't want to deal with herself

˚₊· ͟͟͞➳❥ After all, as manipulative as Victoria may be, even she has her limits; And it just so happens that with Touma's cult-like following, he's able to fill the gaps she left by being equally as manipulative

→ And so, began the progress of what the two of them referred to as a “Mutually beneficial contractual relationship”

→ Though, some say that certain relationships can evolve in the oddest ways.

♝•°•═════ஓ๑【 ♛ 】๑ஓ═════•°•♝

[morimakesfanart]

hey I honestly love this story a lot and the drawings! how are the other chapters coming along !

I don't normally answer this type of question because then I get asked more and more which puts a lot of pressure on me HOWEVER I've been wanting to give everyone an update so I'll answer this time ;3c

The next chapter is pretty much done. It will act as final prep for the Announcement Day. I want to have more of said Announcement Day written before I post the next chapter (I also have original comics and commissions to do). The Announcement Day arc is probably going to be 4-5 chapters; I'm still drafting the 2nd. (It took me all of last year to figure out Mori's outfit for it & I really hope everyone ends up liking it.)

TBH I thought I would have gotten to this arc sooner -like ch20 lvl of sooner. It's making me better understand my writing style actually translates to written from comic form (I over estimated how many less chapters it would take to write instead of draw), and how I format stories. I had one point joked to a friend that I wouldn't get to the Sindria Arc until ch50, and I'm panicking that, that might actually be what's going to happen. My current plan is to try to get there around ch40. I had a bunch of things planned for between the Announcement Day and when Sinbad heads to the Kou Empire, but I'm gonna have to either turn a bunch into summaries, cut them out, or move them to a later point in time like I've had to do with a bunch of scenes already. I need to get better at handling timeskips. Every time I attempt one I end up realizing that there's no reason these characters should have taken this long to have this conversation if they see each other every day, so I end up erasing the timeskip 🙃

---

On top of Sindria's Prophet, I've started making some one shot omake things that will end up in a different collection (The Adventures of Simpbad) because idk how else to fit them. That will be where I fullfil the requests I've gotten for more intermission and AU chapters, and I'm posting this as a promise that I'm actually doing it. They won't be as edited or cleaned up as Sindria's Prophet, and not all of them will get art ... probably. Any chapters that do build off of each other or SP will have that marked for convenience. There will be a few NSFW too because I want to practice that, but I won't be posting those on Tumblr because of the current user agreement.

Some will also be my dabbles into figuring out what I'm going to do for the Adventures AU that a lot of people have asked for. Since Sindria's Prophet is a teleportation Isekai, the Adventures AU won't be. It was when le trying to write an Adventures AU that I ended up settling/deciding on Sindria's Prophet. I have plans for both Isekai and born in universe versions of Adventures AU as well as different starting points. So far it looks more drama heavy than SP, but I require comedy to live so it will still be in it. Since I'm not entirely sure how I want to handle it, I will be using reader feed back to decide on the final base.

---

All of this has actually gotten me a lot more comfortable with writing stories instead of only making comics. It's a lot faster. Scenes that take me a week to draw I get written in a day or 2. So I'm starting to play around with a few of my original stories in this format. There is one that absolutely can't transfer to written properly because it's a silent comic (no text anywhere) but that one's always been a bit different than my usual stuff anyway.

---

I hope that answered your question;;; I kinda just started rambling. I hope you're having a good day :3

[ultrajustjo]

Welcome!

Choir screen from the Cathedral of Valladolid, ca. 1763-64, at the Metropolitan Museum of Art in New York City. Photo taken June 4, 2023.

Visio divina

For my Summer 2023 formation for ministry class, I am employing the prayer practice Visio divina on a weekly basis by contemplating art (and the art found in Creation) and scripture through meditation/prayer. Prayer, art, nature, and travel? Yes, please!

I've chosen the choir gate as the art for week 1. The gate is a massive piece that spans the gallery at the Met, dwarfing everything around it. Its history is shown in a photo below.

How did I end up at the Met? My son and his fiance took the train up to NYC from Baltimore and asked us to meet them before flying out to OK and China, respectively. Of course, we had to meet up at the Yale Club (that serves Yale, UVA, and maybe Dartmouth alumni). It's quite frou frou and very fun, but we were too late for brunch -- the room was being used for a Drag Queen Brunch. The sounds from that party that floated up to the library were awesome, and I did step out onto the floor and try to crash the party, but my son dragged me back into the elevator. Shame.

No cameras allowed at the Yale Club, but you had to use your camera to see the rules, so...yeah, I took a pic cuz I'm a smartass.

(Duke, Notre Dame, Cornell, and Brown alums who like the idea of the Yale Club can actually join the Cornell Club in NYC -- I'd look into it but I've managed without it this long (Go Irish!) so I doubt I'll join after my time at Duke. As I'm continuing in ministry, I also doubt that I'd want to fork over the dough for it, but a girl can dream. I do like nice things, and the Yale Club is fun!)

We weren't going to sit around a club all day, nice as the library was, so we headed to the Met hoping for art, public restrooms, and a rooftop view of Central Park. Two out of three: the line for the single elevator to the roof snaked all around one gallery and none of us had patience for it. As we headed for Egypt, we ran smack into a beautiful collection of religious art not housed at the Cloisters. I didn't actually smack into the gate, but I felt quite gobsmacked and a little dizzy leaning all the way back to look at its height.

Navigate to this page and click on the LISTEN button to hear more about the gate and its history. https://www.metmuseum.org/art/collection/search/201926

The verses

I've selected II Peter 1:11 (LB) for my meditation on this choir gate:

"And God will open wide the gates of heaven for you to enter into the eternal kingdom of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ."

That's good stuff on its own, but just look below at the treasure trove of faith declarations that precede it!

II Peter 1:1-11:

"The faith I speak of is the kind that Jesus Christ our God and Savior gives to us. How precious it is, and how just and good he is to give this same faith to each of us.

2 Do you want more and more of God’s kindness and peace? Then learn to know him better and better. 3 For as you know him better, he will give you, through his great power, everything you need for living a truly good life: he even shares his own glory and his own goodness with us! 4 And by that same mighty power he has given us all the other rich and wonderful blessings he promised; for instance, the promise to save us from the lust and rottenness all around us, and to give us his own character.

5 But to obtain these gifts, you need more than faith; you must also work hard to be good, and even that is not enough. For then you must learn to know God better and discover what he wants you to do. 6 Next, learn to put aside your own desires so that you will become patient and godly, gladly letting God have his way with you. 7 This will make possible the next step, which is for you to enjoy other people and to like them, and finally you will grow to love them deeply. 8 The more you go on in this way, the more you will grow strong spiritually and become fruitful and useful to our Lord Jesus Christ. 9 But anyone who fails to go after these additions to faith is blind indeed, or at least very shortsighted and has forgotten that God delivered him from the old life of sin so that now he can live a strong, good life for the Lord.

10 So, dear brothers, work hard to prove that you really are among those God has called and chosen, and then you will never stumble or fall away. 11 And God will open wide the gates of heaven for you to enter into the eternal kingdom of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

The meditation

Ready to join me? Reread the passage (I prefer the NLT for more inclusive language and clear phrasing -- the LB used the phrase "gates of Heaven," so I felt obliged to use it.) Scroll up to the picture of the gate, examine the art at your leisure, and let the words of the scripture lead your thoughts as you settle into prayer with God. How does the iron relate to the Word? What about the piece grabs your attention? Why did the artists use this design? How does its use in a church relate to the scripture passage? How does viewing the gate affect the way you feel about God today?

What words stuck with you when you read the passage? What phrases do you keep coming back to? How do you feel about them? Do they inspire you? Anger you? Confuse you? Are you ok with this?

After you think your thoughts, be still and let God speak to you.

(See, prof? I was paying attention! Thanks for leading me.)

Info and photos for perspective. Note how the first cross section of the gate doesn't even make it into the shot. Massive, beautiful, skilled work that functioned in a religious setting. Amazing! God is good in this crazy life!

[ro-is-struggling]

some important updates

Hi guys! I just wanted to come here and tell you about some of the stuff I've been thinking about and planning for the next couple of months for the blog! 

I recently hit the 600 follower mark (omg thank you all so much I still can't believe it) and I've been promising you guys a follower celebration since the 200 mark or something so I really want to focus on that. I'm on vacation which means I actually have the time to do a project like that so that's exactly what I'm going to do. The official announcement with all the details about it will be posted soon so if you're interested keep an eye out for it! 

I'm planning on taking all this free time I have to work on the requests for the follower celebration so that means that all my other projects will have to wait to be finished. All my pending requests and the Undercover Series will be temporary on hiatus until I finish with the follower celebration. I have a lot of wips and ideas so don't worry, I'll keep working on those! It's just going to take me a little longer to get to them.

Regarding the Undercover Series, I'm going to change it from a ~series~ to a ~trilogy~ for now while I work on some ideas and decide where I want the story to go. But that doesn't mean I will abandon it or that it's cancelled or something, I just need some time to organize stuff. 

I'm very excited for the follower celebration. I've been working on it for ages and I can't wait to post it for you guys to see! It might be a little different than most (at least from the ones I saw), but it's a format that I think works better for me and my style of writing. And I think you guys will like it! 

So, yeah... That's all. I have a few wips that might get finished in time to post before the follower celebration, but I don't know yet so I won't make any promises.

Thank you for reading and I hope to see you in my ask box once the follower celebration starts💜💜💜

[paperstarwriters]

People don't often interact with my #just thinking posts so Idk if people ever see it at all, but even then, I wanna throw this out there and just keep myself accountable.

Warning for Anxieties, implied suicidal ideation, academic stress

This is a post about some of my current struggles, I'm not talking about that in depth—the main point is more hopeful I think—but the topic is there.

there's been this song I've been listening on loop to recently; Look at the Sky by Porter Robinson. It's really sweet, and really nice and alongside, Something Comforting, Get Your Wish, and You are Enough (which, unlike the others is by Sleeping at last) it's a really uplifting and encouraging set of songs that has helped me out a lot in encouraging me through my studies.

As the semester comes to an end however, the stress continues to build and grow and with it, my panic and fear.

I have no official diagnoses, but I know well enough that there's something askew in there. A little tender part that's vulnerable to failure and stress and so many other things.

And this is why I just keep coming back to Look at the Sky.

It's the chorus.

Look at the sky, I’m still here I’ll be alive next year I can make something good, oh Something good

It reads like a promise to me. Mainly because of the second line.

I'll be alive next year.

I'll keep myself here, today so I can make it to next year.

Idk. Porter Robinson mentions how it's about the creative cycle of taking in other people's work to create a new tapestry of creativity, but I always linger on this song for my studies rather than any of my creative writing.

I'm not very good at what I'm studying at, and I can't help but associate my talent in the field with how much I should like it. The study is interesting, and when I'm not constantly worrying about failing projects or failing quizzes or failing exams, the content is fascinating and fun to learn.

But I don't do well on the assignments.

I'm not failing. I'm not so horribly behind on all my assignments that I know that I'll fail or something, but I can't help but feel the need to get at least 90% on everything. It's fear driven I think. My parents wanted that of me when I was a child. the sentiment continues to linger on in me.

I didn't do so great on a single assignment this time. It's for a project—one I need to complete in order to pass the class at all. But I messed up on the formatting and I left a few tails undone at the end. It was incredibly rushed and a miracle that I had it finished at all, but I still can't help the sickening feeling that I should have done better. Even if I was staying up way past what was healthy for me, something that would cause me general dizziness and heavy sickness later on in the day, I still felt like I should have exerted myself more to check up on it and get it nice and pretty and polished.

I haven't gotten my grade back for that assignment yet. and I can't help but feel sick thinking about it.

I know that logically, the portion of my grade that would be affected might be pretty small, and I've done pretty well in the rest of my assignments. I'll probably be able to pass the class.

Still I can't help the feeling that If I don't do perfect on every single assignment, I will fail.

I have to hand in a physical copy of the assignment tomorrow, I felt so sick going back over my digital copy— forced to look at all of my sloppy and messy mistakes. I felt fear looking at it.

I felt a lot of things, really. Nasty, dark and irrational things.

But...

I'm still here.

I'll continue to try and be here tomorrow too. And the day after that. I'll make it to next year.

And even if I don't do great in that class, I can still make it to the degree I want. It'll take a little stress and struggle, but I'll get there eventually.

And until then, I can still make good things—I can write the little stories, and one shots and fanfics that make me happy.

Look at the sky, I’m still here I’ll be alive next year I can make something good, oh Something good

I promise.